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Tag Archives: friendship
One of my best friends in the world is Jodi Crooks. Today is her birthday.
“Please hold for an important call from Jodi Crooks” – Jodi, pretending to be her own assistant
Jodi and I met when I took a temporary gig working in the growing industry of lawn care. She worked for the sister company and our desks were near one another. One day we were the only people in the whole building and I was saying something to her.. and she finally looked up and said “oh! Are you talking to me?” To which I replied “Noooooo… I was talking to the OTHER JODI… but to make SURE you know I’m talking to YOU from now on I will make sure I call you Jodi CROOKS…” This is way funnier when I tell it in person.
From that point forward, she became JodiCrooks .. all one word. Everyone calls her that. I am a trendsetter obviously. Also at that point, we became great friends.
“Do my pants smell?” – me to Jodi.. Jodi has no sense of smell
JodiCrooks and I have been through some crazy stuff together. Divorces, unemployment, living together, tattoos, lots of laughs, puppet shows, boys, the stupidity of boys.. being splattered by fake blood at an Alice Cooper show… concerts.. Alice, Velvet Revolver, Motley Crue, and just this week, The Fray…
We just like hanging out and chatting.. and often sit with both our laptops watching tv and MSNing each other in the same room. We are weird.
We spend at least part of the holidays together every year. This past year it was Jodi, Katy, Josh and I for Christmas Eve and morning.. we decided that in light of our interesting “family” that would should adopt a new name.. and hence became the “Warrcrookens”.. A combination of Warren and Crooks.. the names we kept from our ex husbands. LOL.
Jodi and I love the word “LAUGH”.. We both collect signs that say laugh.. and we’ve now gone to the extreme of having matching tattoos done on our wrists. It’s one of the biggest things she and I have in common….the laughter itself. We are both pretty funny people and we love laughing.. and do it as often as possible. Plus, the tattoo is a constant reminder that if you can still laugh at things, you’ll be okay. And no, it’s not a commitment ceremony thing. We both like boys. Quite a lot, actually.
“Way to take the high road by lying” – Jodi to me after not so successfully juggling 2 dates in one night.. only to run into date #1 making out with someone else at which point I pretended to be all offended.
We’re the type of people who call each other just to say something funny. Or for me to call and sing “The Wind Beneath my Wings”… or play “Hungry Like the Wolf” over the phone because it’s on the radio… (after all, Jodi IS President of the Duran Duran Fan Club…) Or call if “Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch” come on the radio.. she loves Mark Wahlberg.
For all the laughter and the tears .. and the many bottles of wine consumed either celebrating or commiserating… for just being the wonderful, pretty hilarious person that you are…. Happy Birthday Jodi Crooks!
You are a great BFF. Here’s to many more misadventures!
I have to tell you that at one point in my life on the internet I was a sucker. I know, I seem somewhat savvy and smart.. one who isn’t easily duped, shall we say. However, when I first got the interweb via dial up about 15 years ago, I was a little more naive and gullible. It’s before I’d toughened up and got me some web smarts.
I can remember as a kid getting letters (remember those? perhaps you don’t if you are under the age of say, 40.) Long, long ago… people would write things ON PAPER.. telling each other news and events and how they were feeling. THEN they would put those pieces of information into envelopes and address them to whomever they pleased and then would put a stamp on them and MAIL them. Sometimes it would take DAYS for the “letter” to reach the other person. To which you reply.. “DAYS! Egads! How can that still be NEWS then! unless I get things INSTANTANEOUSLY it’s worthless! After all, I stand in front of the microwave yelling HURRY UP!” But, once again, I digress….
I would get letters from others that would instruct me to follow the instructions so as “not to break the chain”. It could bestow huge blessings and riches upon you by following the instructions contained therein. Upon my very first receipt of such a thing I made the requisite copies, decided who to send these to (anonymously of course..) and sent them out. But then of course, one of those people sent it BACK to me.. because after all, it was anomymous. Therefore, I would send out again.. and then of course get another at which point I’d give up. The postage was killing me. Truthfully, half the time I didn’t send it out on the first round. I have a condition. It’s called “postally challenged”.
But then came the world wide web.. and email.. and instant communication. And for whatever reason, these same ridiculous chain letters made their way onto the interwebs. Promises of untold riches if only you’d forward onto 45 friends .. and the threat of death, horrible injury, halitosis, athlete’s foot, giant boils and of course, never ever again being attractive to the opposite sex if you were to break the chain.
However, these helpful missives did of course help us with passing along valuable information that would protect us.. for example, I now know how to avoid waking up in a tub full of ice sans one kidney… that I shouldn’t visit 3 different tanning beds in one day for fear I will cook myself from the inside out…I should never let anyone help me with a flat tire as it is a sure sign that they are going to murder me. Not to mention how I learned to stop flashing my headlights at cars whose lights are out as it’s a surely a gang initiation (not some poor guy who forgot to turn his lights on…) Helpful stuff like that.
Then too, there’s the whole public service element. Because you KNOW that when a child goes missing the FIRST thing a parent or law enforcement officials do is create a chain email. It should be extremely vague, not really indicate what the child was actually wearing nor give any contact information other than some email address. This is the epitome of effective police work.
And, let’s not forget all the cool free stuff we’re all going to get through simply pressing send.. just this week I’ll be getting oodles of gift certificates from stores and restaurants, several free laptops and a HUGE chunk of Bill Gates’ fortune.
There was one point early on that I “fell” for these things and would forward along.. worried that some sort of bad luck would befall me. After all, I was raised Catholic and you know how superstitious we are… But it’s gotten out of hand. I’ve caught myself forwarding them again… just the somewhat entertaining ones about horoscopes and such… after all, you can never be too careful… however, the phone didn’t ring with some fantastic news, my secret crush did not call to confess his undying love for me nor did I lose any limbs. However I know I likely looked like a bit of a superstitious fool to some. So from now on, I’ll only be forwarding funny stuff.. or emails that don’t come with a “condition”.
I henceforth refuse to pass along another “good-luck-Irish-blessing-bloody-mary-curse-luck-in-love-better-forward-this-to-thirty-people-or-you-will-not-only-die-a-horrible-death-but-you’ll-never-get-laid-again” chain letter.
Your inbox will thank me.
p.s. posted a tweet about “bad luck” and emails on Twitter and @a_black_cloud immediately started following me. I blocked it. Can’t be too careful….Life: Moving forward. And moving out of Barrie in one month. The countdown is on. Love: Obviously, I am having issues with my love life because I did not forward along the “right” email. Crazy cat lady, here I come. Pants: Again, obviously this is part of the curse. Or coulda been that bag of Cheddar Corn.
This is what I do when I feel slightly lazy about actually writing a blog. I answer these questionnaires. But it’s fun. I know you’re supposed to put it on your Facebook, but y’know… I actually do like filling them out when there are some interesting questions.. plus, I usually learn something about myself when I do them.. do your own. You know you want to.
WHAT WAS YOUR:
1. last beverage = Coffee
2. last phone call = Oddly, a wrong number.
3.last text message = a direct message from Twitter. Other than that, one from Katy.
4. last song you listened to = Jungle Love by Morris Day and the Tyme
5. last time you cried = last week
HAVE YOU EVER:
6. dated someone twice = yes
7. been cheated on = Yes
8. kissed someone & regretted it = ohhhhhh yes
9. lost someone special = yes.
10. been depressed = yes
11. been drunk and threw up = yes. But not for a very very long time.
LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:
THIS YEAR HAVE YOU: (2009)
15. Made a new friend = yes
16. Fallen out of love = yes
17. Laughed until you cried = Absolutely
18. Met someone who changed you = yes
19. Found out who your true friends were = Absolutely have
20. Found out someone was talking about you = Yes, I always find out. Wasn’t surprised.
21. Kissed anyone on your friend’s list= Yes. But not telling which ones… 😉
22. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life = Most of them in some respect or another.
23. How many kids do you want to have= I have two amazing kids. One of each. Both terrific humans.
24. Do you have any pets = yes… Mocha the Wonder Dog. Also have visitation with Barley who lives with the ex.
25. Do you want to change your name = I went from Kubilius to Warren. Go read my blog on names. That’ll answer it.
26. What did you do for your last birthday = I spent time with my family. I had a lovely birthday dinner with a great friend. I got tattoos with my BFF Jodi (well, a while later). S’about it.
27. What time did you wake up today = which time? First time.. about 6am. Went back to sleep.
28. What were you doing at midnight last night =watching tv with Katy. And on the computer. (I know, you’re SHOCKED)
29. Name something you CANNOT wait for! = The next adventure!!
30. Last time you saw your Mother = Couple of weeks ago. And I’ll see her this Sunday.
31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life? = Have more time. That I would be more organized.
32. What are you listening to right now = the breeze, outdoor sounds.. nothing in particular.
33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom = Yes. Not recently. Perhaps I should call that MySpace guy?
34. What’s getting on your nerves right now = not being able to motivate myself some days.
35. Most visited webpage = Facebook/Twitter and some blogs I regularly read.
36. Whats your real name =Elizabeth Ann Margaret Kubilius Warren
37. Nicknames = Beth, Bethany, EvilGenius, Funniest Girl in the World, Promo Princess.
38. Relationship Status = Single. Let’s just leave that one alone.
39: Zodiac Sign= Aries. Dragon in Chinese horoscope.
40. Male or female? = Female. Seriously, do you think ANY guys actually fill these things out?
41. Elementary =Glen Echo
42. Middle School = Glen Brae
43. High school/College = Glendale/Mohawk/Conestoga
44. Hair colour =dark brown/black
45. Long or short = long
46. Height = 5 foot 4
47. Eyes = hazel/brown
49. Piercings = yes. Move along now.
50. Tattoos = yes, three. Aries symbol at the top of my back, Dragon on left hip area.. LAUGH on my left wrist.
51. Righty or lefty = really really right handed
52. First injury = Cracked my head open falling off the bathtub when I was 3
53. First piercing = Ears
54. First best friend = Julie Deumo
55. First sport you joined = Dofasco Minor Bowling League. Oh yeah.
56. First vacation =Four Winds Cottages.. on the Ottawa River (on the Quebec side..)
58. First pair of trainers = Never been that dedicated to buy a certain name brand
59. Eating = nothing. but now have a craving for barbequed meat.
60. Drinking = coffee
61. I’m about to = get jiggy with it. Nah, write some stuff… do some research.
62. Listening to = didn’t we already have this question? Nothing much.
63. Waiting to = eat.
YOUR FUTURE :
64. Want kids? = Grandkids are next. And not anytime SOON!!
65. Get Married? = eh… doesn’t look promising at the moment. LOL. But you never know!
66. Career? = Working on something very cool at the moment.
WHICH IS BETTER :
67. Lips or eyes = Eyes although the lips are good for kissing.. meh. Both.
68. Hugs or kisses= need both please.
69. Shorter or taller = Taller please. Doesn’t need to be by much.
70. Older or Younger = Older, but negotiable.
71. Romantic or spontaneous = both, each makes the other happen
72. Nice stomach or nice arms = I love arms, absolutely arms
73. Sensitive or loud = I like both depending on the circumstance (or was that I AM both..)
74. Hook-up or relationship = Relationship
75. Trouble maker or hesitant = Trouble maker. Not sure if this is “me” or prospective partner but the answer is the same either way.
76. Kissed a stranger =yes
77. Drank hard liquor = yes
78. Lost glasses/contacts = yes
79. Sex on first date = no
80. Broken someone’s heart = Yes, and if I could change it I would, I never intended to
81. Had your own heart broken = yes
82. Been arrested = no
83. Turned someone down = yes
84. Cried when someone died = yes
85. Fallen for a friend? = yes.
DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
86. Yourself = Most times
87. Miracles = Absolutely. I’ve had a couple. Hopefully I haven’t reached my quota!
88. Love at first sight = yes
89. Heaven = yes
90. Santa Claus = I believe in the reason for Santa Claus
91. Kiss on the first date = yes
92. Angels = absolutely
94. Had more than 1 girlfriend/boyfriend at a time = yes.
95. Did you sing today? = not yet, my set’s not until 10pm.
96. Ever cheated on somebody? = I think that is answered by the “ever date 2 people at once question”
97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go? = To the time when RIM stock went public. Then I would BUY BUY BUY. Apple too.
98. If you could pick a day from last year and relive it, what would it be?= Tough call. But I’d have to say no. Everything happens for a reason. Oh wait, there were a couple of… oh, never mind.
99. Are you afraid of falling in love? = Nope!
100. Posting this as 100 truths? = yup
“Friend – a person known well to another and regarded with liking, affection and loyalty.” – Collins English Dictionary
I had the opportunity to get together with a friend this week… I had not seen her in months as we no longer live close.. she lives out of the country during the winter months…
Karen and I have been friends for about 12 years.. and we’ve been through a lot together.. tough times, moving, fiances, weddings, divorces, falling in love, falling out of love, laughter, tears and many, many bottles of wine. We spent the evening catching up on everything that had been happening in the last several months.. and once again there was laughter, a few tears.. and of course, the ever present wine.
I’ve had many friends over the years.. check my “friends list” on Facebook.. there are 834 at the present count. These are “friends” from grade school, high school, various jobs, the music industry, and various and sundry misadventures associated with all of them. I would consider everyone on my friend list a friend of some regard.. but when FB installed the friend categories.. I was a little stumped at how to “group” people (so I have not.. ) but this combined with my Karen visit got me thinking about the various friendships I have had over the years.
My first best friend was Julie. One day I just walked into her back yard while she was having a tea party with her mom and uncle. We became fast friends at the age of three.. had our first sleepovers together… played “wedding” (I was always the groom as I had short hair and she was the girly girl..)… first day of school together. We were BFFs until grade 3.. she went to that grade.. I went directly to grade four. The social hierarchy changed.. and I was now running with a different crowd.. interestingly, Julie became BFFs with my sister.. and they are still friends.
I have always had a lot of male friends.. not as many “girl” friends. The first friends I hung out with regularly were the neighbourhood boys.. Stevie, Brian, Mario and Marky. We would play “Flintstones” and climb trees and ride bikes and do cool stuff where you got dirty. I was more of a tomboy and preferred that to playing the groom in various wedding or house scenarios. But then again.. I skipped a grade and.. got new friends.
Through grades 4-8 and into high school I pretty much hung out with the same group of girls.. Bambi, Crystal, Trish and Starr (yes, real names..) But I always had different “groups” of friends.. there were always the male friends… the groups of girls.. the kids in band and math club.. different friends for different social situations… Grades 7/8 and into high school, Lynn was one of my best buddies.. Judy and I were friends all through grade school and beyond…
In high school there was a group of 11 girls… Bambi named us “The Natural Highs”.. each one of us had a flavour name.. Vanilla, Chocolate, Butterscotch.. etc.. I was Cinnamon. We hung out, partied… had fun. But I always felt not quite comfortable with “girl” friends.. just a certain element of competition I guess.
I preferred hanging out with the boys.. Craig, Tony, Mike and Joe. Sitting in Mike’s basement listening to CFNY and “punk”.. Elton Motello, the Pistols, Jane County and the Electric Chairs.. all the interesting music Mike’s older brother turned our way.. we had a lot of fun together. Plus, Craig was my boyfriend.. so the making out factor certainly weighed into the equation.
And of course, I must mention my spare period BFF and Hallway patrol partner Steve. We’d randomly stop younger kids asking to see their hall passes (we didn’t have them at our school).. just because we were silly. Stephen and I are still friends.. which makes me very happy.
In college I was inseparable from Avril.. we did everything together. Talked, partied, school work.. you name it.. we liked to spend time with Wayne, John and Paul.. roommates who lived in her building. And of course we hung out with people in our class.. Al, Tony, John… George .. (please notice I remember all the guys and not so much the girls…) Oddly, still keep in touch with a few people from college, but most weren’t in my class. Funny that. And through the magic of Facebook have had the pleasure of catching up and reconnecting with a few.
I’ve made friends wherever I’ve gone.. some good friends, some great friends.. some for the time being and some for what seems like forever. I have people still in my life that I’ve known for 25, 30 years or more.. there has to be a reason why I think. Some connection that just never goes away. I met my friend Mark when we were dating members of the same family.. those relationships broke up.. he and I wound up working together.. and through years and distance and everything else we somehow end up still staying in touch after more than 25 years. Crazy.
I just find it interesting thinking about what makes people friends.. and what KEEPS them friends. One of my best friends ever is named Ami. She and I became friends by happenstance.. she phoned my house one night for a business reason and I answered the phone by yelling into it “TURN ON CHANNEL THREE!! RANDY BACHMAN IS ON THE SIMPSONS!!” I can’t recall if I was just excited that I knew someone on the Simpsons or if I thought she was someone else.. We quickly became fast friends.. and I was even the maid of honour at her wedding. But, with moves.. and career changes and everything that happens in life.. we’ve drifted apart. Completely my fault I believe. One of my personal goals for the not too distant future will be to reconnect with Ami. I miss her a lot. (Please note that instead of procrastinating about this, I actually found her phone number and called her .. like.. just now. I got her machine and I left her a goofy message involving me singing a song about her, eating some ribs and other nonsense. I am not right in the head. You already knew that.)
I think sometimes many friendships are based on convenience.. whether or not you see those people regularly. I know that since I moved north, there are BFFs that I don’t hear from as often. And of course since my employment situation changed there are another whole bunch that I have not been as close to. It happens. But the people I consider my true friends are the ones who make the effort to keep in touch.. to touch base.. to see how you are. Mind you, I’ve had friendships that have “gone by the wayside” because of location, distance.. what have you.. One of my best friends in my 20’s .. Mona/Lisa (depending on how you know her..) and I have always attempted to keep in touch and often go years without seeing each other.. but we somehow pick up where we left off.
“Misfortune shows those who are not really friends.” – Aristotle
Kelly was my first “grown up” girl friend I think.. interestingly, she was the ex girlfriend of the man I married.. she was in my wedding party.. I love her to death. She lives in Singapore now and we’ve done the “drifting apart”.. another person who I’d like to see back in my life.
Jennifer and I met many years ago .. and ended up working together years later.. and quickly became best friends. She’s a combination of friend and surrogate daughter for me.. hence my title “the new mommy”. We’ve been through ridiculous amounts of fun and pain together .. and there are more adventures on the way I’m sure.. what with me moving.. and her having a baby and all.. even though we’re in different cities at the moment we still manage to stay connected.
Carmen and I met and became instant friends.. we talk often and somehow just have that “click” .. I guess you’d call it.. just immediate camraderie. We started calling each other BFF’s immediately .. and we really are.
Cathy and I met many years ago and our paths have crossed enough times that we figured out that we are likely meant to be friends for life. We’ve been there for each other enough times to know.
Interestingly, one of my best friends is also an “ex”.. Fernando and I were together for a few years and shared a lot.. split last year and it was tough. But now we are in a place where we really are best friends. Which makes me happy that we didn’t have to cut each other out of our lives.
The person I call my “heterosexual life partner”.. is my friend Jodi.. We met through work several years ago.. and coincidentally lived in the same neighbourhood.. and again, just one of those “clicks”. We will often joke that we wish one of us was a man, or we were both gay.. because then I’m certain we’d be spending our lives together .. and hence the “heterosexual life partner”.. we spend all major holidays together and this past Christmas renamed our unusual family unit “The Warrcrookens” – a combination of both our last names.. Jodi and I have had more than our share of misadventures. I believe this weekends’ involves liquor and tattoos. No, not kidding.
And I also have a huge group of what I call “virtual friends”.. people with whom I speak with literally every day but don’t see in person.. people who probably know more about me than people who see me in person regularly.. Evan.. Irvine..Kelly…. Michelle.. my new friend Kyle.. and a few others … people who I consider to also be great friends despite distance or lack of physical contact.
I guess the common thread with any friendship is stuff in common.. I know that with all of the friendships I cherish, its likely the easy ability to laugh..and of course love.. Laughter is my favourite thing in the world.. if you can make me laugh.. we’ll get along fine..
I have a plaque on my hallway wall that reads “A friend is a gift you give yourself”. It was a gift from Ami years ago. It fell at one point and broke but I glued it together again and put it back up. and I guess I kind of think of laughter and love as the glue that will hopefully put back together some of those neglected and broken friendships.. fingers crossed.
Life: Is in flux. Glad to have so many good friends to lean on during the tough times.
Love: I believe love is friendship on fire. I read that on a travel mug or bumper sticker somewhere. Yeah, its very uh.. mushy. LOL
Pants: Pretty much all of my friends wear pants. Just an FYI.